One Month

Posted by Tasha

One month ago, today, we had the most beautiful wedding I could have ever dreamed of. Since then we have shared the most intimate kisses either of us have ever known.

Just when you think it can’t get any better, it does.

It’s been a busy month. We finished our finals after the wedding. The semester during which we were most busy planning and preparing, amazingly produced good grades. Tigritza’s parents still haven’t left for home in India and we flew to CA to spend almost a week a with them and my now sister-in-law and her husband. It was an awesome mini-vacation.

Because of the busy, but oh-so-eventful weeks before the wedding, we didn’t blog, but we really feel like we need to fill in our readers about the excitement leading up to the wedding.  It will most likely be out of order, but eventually lots of stories and photos and reminiscing will be had.

Just wanted to quickly post – we couldn’t be happier. Happy one month anniversary! 

3 Weeks Away!

Posted by Tasha

Alright, so you noticed it's been a while since we've updated last... yes, over 2 months without a post! We will do our best to catch you up! It's been a busy couple of months and I cannot wrap my mind around the fact that in exactly 3 weeks, I'll be married. And if I'm being completely honest, what I mean by that: in exactly 3 weeks, all the planning, worrying, and organizing will all melt into one day of awesomeness.

I CANNOT WAIT!

And I finally understand why brides-to-be get so anxious at the end of the planning and say "I wish it was my wedding day already." It's quite simple, actually, but I didn't really understand it until now. We want the planning to end. I can't believe there are people out there who are married wedding planners! How is that possible?

An update to catch you up: In the last few months, we've actually been able to finalize a few things.
-Food: both Indian and Russian - it's about time that it's confirmed
-Cake: taste testing was way more fun than I imagined - delicious and beautiful and confirmed
-DJ: he has our list of 'dos' and 'don'ts' and our schedule of events (speeches, first dance) confirmed
-Ceremony: script has been written and perfected. Officiant is confirmed
-Photographers: and photobooth - sure to be a hit at the wedding, sooo confirmed
-Rentals: plates, linens, lighting, draping, etc - expensive as hell, but confirmed
-Rehearsal dinner: Italian anyone? mmm confirmed
-Hair appointments: lets throw in the make-up too... confirmed
-Hotels: booked and of course: confirmed
-Wedding Bands: Tigritza's not home, so I'm wearing mine now! ssshhh... gorgeous and confirmed
-Alcohol: open bar with extra ... we can't run out, it's a Russian wedding! confirmed
-Flowers: all the jars collected and dropped off. very confirmed
-Seating chart: basically done (crazy fun doing this on PowerPoint), we have all our guests confirmed!
-Henna Party: thanks to Tigritza's sister, it's gonna be confirmed

So, what's left you ask?
-Best people clothing: there have been a few hiccups along the way, but we'll iron it all out for the big day. I have to make poetry out of this, otherwise where's the bliss? Tigritza, do not edit this out, or I will shout!
-String quartet for the ceremony: can't honestly put "confirmed" on this as they are a bunch of college kids who aren't so reliable, but they have been booked.
-Crafts: an ongoing project - we'll post about this separately. We had an INCREDIBLE craft day with some local friends - more details to come.
-First dance: we've moved the table in our living room so we have extra space to practice... it's going to be the best first dance EVER - as long as I don't fall! Tigritza, don't step on my toes!
-Huppah: Lucky to have my Dad build it and my friend decorate it. Can't wait to see how it comes together. Should see the final product in a week.
-And finally, find a place to put all the gifts that have been coming in!

Doesn't seem so bad huh?

Stay tuned, we've deprived you from our posts, so you're about to experience posting overdose in the next 3 weeks :)

From Fiancee to Wife

Posted by Tigritza

Happy New Year! As 2012 kicks in, it's strange to realize that for a full calendar year I've had the honor of calling Tasha my fiancee. But as wonderful as that's been, I'm really looking forward to leaving the word "fiancee" behind, come April.

So here are my Top 5 Things about switching from "Fiancee" to "Wife":

5. No More Incorrect Spelling! This is a huge pet peeve of mine. Things like "head over heals" or "your wonderful" have always sent a shiver down my spine. So the word "fiancee", which should actually have an acute accent over the first "e", is a distinct source of discomfort for me. It basically means that every time I type out the word, I get a little uneasy and a tiny bit stressed out. Dorky as it sounds (hey, I've got nothing to hide!) I'm literally excited about switching to the much simpler W-I-F-E.

4. No More Legal Justification (to the average person, anyway)! When people first find out my fiancee is a woman, I often get something along the lines of: *excited look* "that's great!" followed by *concerned look* "Oooh, so where are you guys going to do it? Isn't it not legal in pennsylvania? Are you going to do it in New York?"
--- Now before I complain about this, believe me, I'd much much rather have this reaction than the awkward or hostile reaction I may expect to get in some more homophobic parts of the country. People who ask me this are likely just curious, or want to show that they are well-informed and truly care about us and the legal issues we're facing. But man, it's frustrating! The more I try to explain the intricacies of the law - like why getting married in a particular state is irrelevant to us when federal recognition is still blocked by DOMA, or like which states can merely recognize vs. actually perform our marriage - the more I feel like I'm justifying to them why my marriage will still truly be a real marriage regardless of who recognizes it. I've begun just responding "yep, New York" to avoid saying anything more. I understand that the more I explain it, the more I'm spreading awareness, which is a good thing - but at this point I'm so excited for the question itself to just disappear. When I introduce my wife, there will be no such legal planning to explain. "Wife" means it's done. We're already married. And if I ever get the question "so where are you guys legally married?" I plan to respond - "everywhere". Our physical location will never define the status of our relationship. The only people who can define that - is us.

3. No More Gender Ambiguity! This may be a case of "be careful what you wish for." When we first got engaged, I was excited about this! I was sick of saying "girlfriend" and having people think I meant "friend who is a girl." The word fiancee, I thought, always meant fiancee: there was no longer any Relationship Ambiguity. And, even cooler, there was Gender Ambiguity. I could say "my fiancee", and let people make their own assumptions about my fiancee's gender. I felt a weird sense of freedom - after all, why should there be a need to share with a new acquaintance whether my fiancee was a man or a woman? Love is love. I get to say "fiancee", and people always know what I mean. BUT, as I soon discovered, Gender Ambiguity sucks. Nothing is more awkward than someone then saying to me "so your fiance - does he live in Philadelphia too?" At this point, I have two choices:

a) Ignore the mistake, push on. "Yes, SHE lives in Philadelphia" *insert painfully awkward moment when friend is embarrassed for having made the assumption*

or

b) Address the mistake. "Actually, my fiancee's a woman. Yes, she lives...etc" -- *between "woman" and "Yes", insert painfully awkward moment when friend is embarrassed for having made the assumption, and worse, their equally awkward "ah, that's nice" head nod of approval in response to my first sentence.*

Using the word "wife", I get to come out with explicit Relationship Non-Ambiguity and explicit Gender Non-Ambiguity at first mention of her existence! I mean, "wife" is pretty damn clear. Even I have trouble saying it! This is going to be fun. :)

2. No More Congratulations! This happens almost every time I meet someone new. And at business school, I meet someone new almost every day. We're having a regular conversation - maybe I'm talking about what I did that weekend - and I say something like "and on Sunday my fiancee and I went to..." Before I can get any further, the listener cuts me off "Oh, CONGRATULATIONS!!!!" I used to love this...back in December 2010, when we first got engaged. Now, it feels like getting a congratulations for an A+ in high school math. It happened sooo long ago!! And we were MID-conversation about something totally unrelated to my engagement or wedding. Worst of all are the unenthusiastic congratulators. It seems like they are as annoyed by it as I am, but they still say it. Why do people feel compelled to interrupt with "congratulations" when I say the word fiancee? Either way, I am excited to transition to "wife". Although, who knows what interruption-reactions that word will bring!

and the #1 thing about switching from Fiancee to Wife:

1. Tasha's finally gonna be my wife!!!!!!!